tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-185971172024-03-08T11:23:17.760+08:00Epilog PejuangIt's All About A Journey Towards The Final DestinationNJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.comBlogger442125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-40934810805148178442023-08-31T00:31:00.006+08:002023-08-31T00:31:29.405+08:00right person at the wrong time<p>right person at the wrong time</p><p>that feeling when you meet <br />the right person at the wrong time<br />is one of the hardest feelings to go through<br />it's definitely not spoken about hard enough</p><p>the chemistry you have together are matched<br />you really like each other a lot<br />maybe you even love each other</p><p>but you know that it is impossible<br />for you to be together right now<br />circumstances just don't allow it</p><p>but you're in denial<br />you still have hope</p><p>so every single night <br />when your head hits the pillow<br />you lie there<br />trusting the universe to maybe,<br />just maybe,<br />one day <br />bring that person back into your life...</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-55433348773537340502023-08-03T13:20:00.003+08:002023-08-03T13:20:31.612+08:00You just can't <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhIw9H_4OAlZ0WGNDc5fJaPqOofsYU4dirDoZqPRYLoyTEkwywbW0o5Rgilx1U_ql6kWUIqoGzgyehtYNJoaemezCGb4_b9X3nbopEEuwAYA6H5G54i9BB9KOW1qc0gtS_uQ3TuC8YJO8u53UqOJspirAD7IUPpVK1h1GDmRY-EMP8JuiUM4S2/s1477/Screenshot_20230803_123419_Instagram.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1477" data-original-width="1078" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhIw9H_4OAlZ0WGNDc5fJaPqOofsYU4dirDoZqPRYLoyTEkwywbW0o5Rgilx1U_ql6kWUIqoGzgyehtYNJoaemezCGb4_b9X3nbopEEuwAYA6H5G54i9BB9KOW1qc0gtS_uQ3TuC8YJO8u53UqOJspirAD7IUPpVK1h1GDmRY-EMP8JuiUM4S2/w146-h200/Screenshot_20230803_123419_Instagram.jpg" width="146" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p>Am I selfish?</p><p>Am I being too carefree?</p><p>Am I taking things for granted?</p><p><br /></p><p>This is really what I meant by</p><p>having no one to pass the baton to</p><p>no one to run alongside with</p><p>I thought I could count on you all</p><p>But in all honesty</p><p>I couldn't </p><p>Your life is still yours</p><p>My life is still mine</p><p>And I have no right to interfere</p><p>No matter how close we are</p><p><br /></p><p>This is painful</p><p>Very painful</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-43231624065419837112023-04-11T13:45:00.002+08:002023-04-11T14:02:12.359+08:00It . Came . Back<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigv99AsrT6-TZD7AQIj3PIDYBR6lA0N5KdXeJ-DnnVGsuH9AKQz0j1U97xA5G_aHyqNxgrojXmyzB62q4ijtSMhEUbYaRZTNybnxfodxCP2Ws0d2danltFNTMJ1mPtThC-KpxrIEe5byzq2JCuJyBxnkbSXiYjq4ZDtiBb9Y7Fec7tdjTuzA/s526/of%20nightmares.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="526" data-original-width="526" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigv99AsrT6-TZD7AQIj3PIDYBR6lA0N5KdXeJ-DnnVGsuH9AKQz0j1U97xA5G_aHyqNxgrojXmyzB62q4ijtSMhEUbYaRZTNybnxfodxCP2Ws0d2danltFNTMJ1mPtThC-KpxrIEe5byzq2JCuJyBxnkbSXiYjq4ZDtiBb9Y7Fec7tdjTuzA/s320/of%20nightmares.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div>It . Came . Back</div><div><br /></div><div>Kacau</div><div><br /></div><div>It's been 15 years</div><div>Why did you return?</div><div><br /></div><div>.</div><div><br /></div><div>I believe that dreams actually reflect whatever is actually going on in our subconscious mind.</div><div><br /></div><div>But some dreams just never make sense.</div><div><br /></div><div>And to add up to that, the repetitive dreams of the same thing - that definitely doesn't make any sense.</div><div><br /></div><div>Horror ones.</div><div><br /></div><div>Like humans parts getting cut up into pieces, and sold in the market ? </div><div>Just like how the butchers do???</div><div>Fingers in a plate ?!</div><div>Or you can choose to have a whole hand instead ?!</div><div>A whole leg hanged from the canopy rail ?!</div><div>A whole spine to be cooked into sup tulang ?!</div><div>And you start to wonder, wasn't these parts of the girl you just met yesterday ?!</div><div>And worse, someone hid a whole box, parts of a person so dear to you, inside your closet ?!</div><div><br /></div><div>What the H*LL ???</div><div><br /></div><div>Horror ones.</div><div><br /></div><div>Like being chased by some pagan priest,</div><div>trying to convert you and join them to worship the sun ?!</div><div><br /></div><div>Horror ones.</div><div><br /></div><div>Like getting chased to be killed . </div><div>Actually getting killed .</div><div>Roaming around predators, carnivorous creatures .</div><div>Running aimlessly for nothing .</div><div><br /></div><div>And that particular series of dreams-turned-into-reality...</div><div><br /></div><div>Where that person</div><div>Who had promised to spend the rest of his life</div><div>With you</div><div>Left</div><div>Simply . just . left</div><div>Without a trace</div><div><br /></div><div>Just a couple of times,</div><div>The dream of him leaving involved the existence of another girl, unknown.</div><div>But in short,</div><div>All those similar, repeated dreams were haunting me from time to time.</div><div>In the early phases, I would wake up crying in the middle of the night.</div><div>Just like how I would wake up startled with the horror bloody events of humans getting cut up and sold in the night market.</div><div><br /></div><div>But soon, I got used to it.</div><div>No more crying. </div><div>No more getting all worked up for the next few days.</div><div>I never liked it though, and I wonder about what it meant, from time to time.</div><div>And some years later, I forgot all about it.</div><div><br /></div><div>The dreams never appeared again</div><div>Because in reality,</div><div>He slowly faded away from my life.</div><div>Disappeared from the place</div><div>He had once occupy</div><div>In my heart.</div><div>Detached.</div><div>Emotionally, physically, mentally.</div><div><br /></div><div>And I didn't remember about this dream,</div><div>Until I made up my mind</div><div>To fully let him go.</div><div><br /></div><div>I wonder</div><div>I really wonder</div><div>The dreams...</div><div>Was it part of God's plan</div><div>To mentally and emotionally prepare me for what was coming</div><div>Years before it was going to happen</div><div><br /></div><div>Yet</div><div>That bloody human butchery</div><div>Doesn't make sense at all</div><div>That pagan priest</div><div>What does it have to do with any part of my life?</div><div><br /></div><div>Whatever monster you are</div><div>Please . Don't . Come . Back</div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-86441592788967638102023-04-10T12:47:00.002+08:002023-04-11T14:01:24.127+08:00Borrow You<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_oofQNC1XByC2x6OkpZMlAsrV55mzB8i-8LSAnsvyHD4f04csP58cEqygvVrK8yVrIRjGI9GuiqbYS7hSVf75mfUu8bEd7yvQ_HAKZkEGvpgbVjbzHkF85AzlqS5vFepkbuvsDwaNqdZjAxGiA-bWLkPlbypfImYGG85Su2W8Nf7ZNZPEw/s1079/borrow.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1079" data-original-width="1079" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf_oofQNC1XByC2x6OkpZMlAsrV55mzB8i-8LSAnsvyHD4f04csP58cEqygvVrK8yVrIRjGI9GuiqbYS7hSVf75mfUu8bEd7yvQ_HAKZkEGvpgbVjbzHkF85AzlqS5vFepkbuvsDwaNqdZjAxGiA-bWLkPlbypfImYGG85Su2W8Nf7ZNZPEw/s320/borrow.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Live</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">In the present</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Worry not</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">About the future</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Learn</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">From the past</div><div><br /></div></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-72397286432214881192023-04-04T13:53:00.005+08:002023-04-11T14:02:46.496+08:00Resilience - Part II<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimdgomySKSIMjvpIp1QL_TaRa0OZmBrljfcumj1kn-1T6SayGn0hXaB0-Mboozo7S3mQmDDEcEMbvtPF5LusjtzMA0u9ZZT0_g1UU_jP2t2Pez-U38kwpxAQxwVLw306QzurNxIEgsRmy_O3OntDThQynEpvaz5lPq_hKdMVPLvXKpH5mGCg/s570/resilience%202.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="570" data-original-width="526" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimdgomySKSIMjvpIp1QL_TaRa0OZmBrljfcumj1kn-1T6SayGn0hXaB0-Mboozo7S3mQmDDEcEMbvtPF5LusjtzMA0u9ZZT0_g1UU_jP2t2Pez-U38kwpxAQxwVLw306QzurNxIEgsRmy_O3OntDThQynEpvaz5lPq_hKdMVPLvXKpH5mGCg/s320/resilience%202.jpg" width="295" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p>This</p><p><br /></p><p>Is exactly how</p><p>Resilience</p><p>Look like</p><p>Before you could see</p><p>That mighty person</p><p>Stand proud and tall</p><p>They stumbled,</p><p>They fell,</p><p>They break,</p><p>They bleed...</p><p>They drown,</p><p>They suffocate</p><p>Bcoz they couldn't breathe...</p><p>They were stuck</p><p>They were lost</p><p>They simply couldn't see...</p><p>Even if</p><p>There was light</p><p>At the end of the tunnel</p><p>They still</p><p>Couldn't reach out</p><p>Couldn't take a step</p><p>Couldn't decide</p><p>Whether</p><p>Staying still or</p><p>Getting up</p><p>To pursue that light</p><p>Would make more sense</p><p>But</p><p>Resilience -</p><p>Who grew together </p><p>With them</p><p>Who were nurtured</p><p>By them</p><p>Since they were</p><p>Little</p><p>During their ups</p><p>And their lows</p><p>In their successes</p><p>As well as collapses -</p><p>Stayed true</p><p>And never left</p><p>Resilience</p><p>Knew</p><p>Exactly</p><p>That it is just</p><p>A matter of time</p><p>Resilience</p><p>Knew</p><p>For sure</p><p>They will</p><p>Get back up</p><p>Again</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-69699331385489366692023-04-01T13:56:00.002+08:002023-04-11T14:04:08.350+08:00Resilience<blockquote style="border: none; margin: 0px 0px 0px 40px; padding: 0px; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidjB8fva99dy8ygjqT5f1Fo7fEvKtQRqe4Tbe9S-53ljvchhQMQkiy6nIK9Yc-0JoL-ZOFru1eSGomEporangShMr-5z0bAzLwLN9GU2_a3dY2PKzyl6OTbtrdR0kfiFk-peJDgTP5kKgTZjQUPpgWZY9lx29Oti5vNcEPu_9D8PkzLDP6yA/s1008/resilience.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1008" data-original-width="1008" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidjB8fva99dy8ygjqT5f1Fo7fEvKtQRqe4Tbe9S-53ljvchhQMQkiy6nIK9Yc-0JoL-ZOFru1eSGomEporangShMr-5z0bAzLwLN9GU2_a3dY2PKzyl6OTbtrdR0kfiFk-peJDgTP5kKgTZjQUPpgWZY9lx29Oti5vNcEPu_9D8PkzLDP6yA/s320/resilience.jpg" width="320" /></a></div></blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Resilience </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">💪🏼</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">It's okay to break down sometimes</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">It's human to break down sometimes</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">There's no rule</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">On how much time out</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">You are allowed to take</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">So take</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">As much time</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">As you need</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">We'll be right here</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Praying for you</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Waiting for you</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Cheering for you</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Yup,</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">You don't have a choice</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">The only way out</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Is to</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Get back up</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">And stand</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Strong</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">🦾</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">❤️</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtIJhg_IXE-toZDmm7Y8cKoKJKePAnugZYxUW2Tc9_G8ZxAQJTh2s-KfotPohjpdQ7GfKMSeXhYPIpCFfxs0fULZHrBJETFuV7bajwVFdsiVbJIpdIYARl5vEXqcFpulRyInVZ6pgA3G2_u5Jht6nh5_oKm4UZ0rotPUVPoFYQ_hVWONsR0g/s1073/progress.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1073" data-original-width="1073" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtIJhg_IXE-toZDmm7Y8cKoKJKePAnugZYxUW2Tc9_G8ZxAQJTh2s-KfotPohjpdQ7GfKMSeXhYPIpCFfxs0fULZHrBJETFuV7bajwVFdsiVbJIpdIYARl5vEXqcFpulRyInVZ6pgA3G2_u5Jht6nh5_oKm4UZ0rotPUVPoFYQ_hVWONsR0g/s320/progress.jpg" width="320" /></a></div></div><div style="background-color: white; text-align: left;"><div class="x1cy8zhl x78zum5 x1q0g3np xod5an3 x1pi30zi x1swvt13 xz9dl7a" style="align-items: flex-start; display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 12px; padding-left: 16px; padding-right: 16px; padding-top: 12px;"><div class="x1iyjqo2" style="flex-grow: 1;"><div class="x78zum5 xdt5ytf xz62fqu x16ldp7u" style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; margin-bottom: -5px; margin-top: -5px;"><div class="xu06os2 x1ok221b" style="margin-bottom: 5px; margin-top: 5px;"><span class="x193iq5w xeuugli x13faqbe x1vvkbs x1xmvt09 x1lliihq x1s928wv xhkezso x1gmr53x x1cpjm7i x1fgarty x1943h6x x4zkp8e x676frb x1nxh6w3 x1sibtaa xo1l8bm xi81zsa x1yc453h" color="var(--secondary-text)" dir="auto" style="display: block; 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border-color: initial; border-radius: inherit; border-style: initial; border-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; display: inline; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0px; position: static; text-align: inherit; touch-action: manipulation; user-select: none;" tabindex="0"><div aria-label="Edit Privacy" class="x6s0dn4 x78zum5 xl56j7k" style="align-items: center; display: flex; justify-content: center;"><div aria-hidden="false" class="x6s0dn4 x3nfvp2 xl56j7k xw3qccf" style="align-items: center; display: inline-flex; justify-content: center; margin-right: 4px;"><span color="var(--primary-text)" style="background-color: transparent; text-align: inherit;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></span></div></div></div></span></span></div></span></span></div></div></div></div></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-70159398568956063342023-03-26T13:58:00.004+08:002023-04-11T14:05:23.160+08:00Words Matter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqEAwPmrxQQp0ZTBFmyNACFQaax6fM_Fw7v-GKwsjDchaKS-HmjnuE8I0wxIyHID9GxX_HMRYZUbRIKHOD_U-dbQHvm25Oyaac-8_ROvakPtZZZsELSH_V4Hy31Q-pPmMYyxIP-jzDfrlAtmpO2EAHxmulVbmRzvXcyDoLSSTkdI-AriFJJA/s526/audio.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="526" data-original-width="526" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqEAwPmrxQQp0ZTBFmyNACFQaax6fM_Fw7v-GKwsjDchaKS-HmjnuE8I0wxIyHID9GxX_HMRYZUbRIKHOD_U-dbQHvm25Oyaac-8_ROvakPtZZZsELSH_V4Hy31Q-pPmMYyxIP-jzDfrlAtmpO2EAHxmulVbmRzvXcyDoLSSTkdI-AriFJJA/s320/audio.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">I don't consider myself a person of linguistic intelligence, but words of affirmation is evidently my language.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">While people usually refer to negative, toxic words and curses as huge red flags,</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Silence and lack of communication could also be pure torture.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Use the right words.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Use kind words.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">B'coz you never know</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Words that seem so neutral</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Can hurt a broken heart</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">A lot more</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Than you could imagine</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Even when you never meant</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Any harm</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">It's a dealbreaker </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Whatever comes out of your mouth </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">is a reflection of your mind and your heart.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Yes</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">To me</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">Words-</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">They matter</div></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-37831325618652836862023-02-26T11:07:00.005+08:002023-02-26T11:07:54.395+08:00Disappear <p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKS9pTvflgH5LH9zLEQe8JIytW6244atE39jHDtVg02Kb8sKPFMRm_MmOW2XKAn0t9ibEBDIY6SjtDeLvoVPu2wqD5YIv6zvTgZ9B-TXpieLXzR6LjVJ2oaZDQaOo7VlfYOGNK9BEHgyo_tVhzP-Tk2LYmEiYBsqroxP7D2_svBH1OwWzMBQ/s564/screen-3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="564" data-original-width="564" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKS9pTvflgH5LH9zLEQe8JIytW6244atE39jHDtVg02Kb8sKPFMRm_MmOW2XKAn0t9ibEBDIY6SjtDeLvoVPu2wqD5YIv6zvTgZ9B-TXpieLXzR6LjVJ2oaZDQaOo7VlfYOGNK9BEHgyo_tVhzP-Tk2LYmEiYBsqroxP7D2_svBH1OwWzMBQ/w400-h400/screen-3.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />There were times when I felt like I wanted to run away.<p></p><p>There were times when I actually ran away and hid myself for hours, only returning at midnight, finding my kids crying frantically in my absence. </p><p>There are still times when I feel like running away again, but I'm too tired to even get up, put on my shoes, and drive away.</p><p>I just want to disappear.</p><p>Really.</p><p>But I can't.</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-3943143278078568752023-02-13T21:28:00.002+08:002023-02-13T21:28:26.676+08:0012+ years<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUGLN0f3mTIryuqvUmBEpFpxJsXPokSEXkHRbx_r-XYuGgxXSGhS5hzWwTBGNdRffnvBXeSsuuDA-LI6PJOCpJK47iD0rH6mYfOrq1Mz22pjB17B3S9d4ZmvqGYRx3Ex0qcqbWujqoAXDqqZyU0yLD2arPB1J2mpqtAsNSzCj_PyAqOvMt5w/s1068/IMG_20230213_212546_846.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1068" data-original-width="854" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUGLN0f3mTIryuqvUmBEpFpxJsXPokSEXkHRbx_r-XYuGgxXSGhS5hzWwTBGNdRffnvBXeSsuuDA-LI6PJOCpJK47iD0rH6mYfOrq1Mz22pjB17B3S9d4ZmvqGYRx3Ex0qcqbWujqoAXDqqZyU0yLD2arPB1J2mpqtAsNSzCj_PyAqOvMt5w/s320/IMG_20230213_212546_846.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiuHElc5a5EK2BzcyKLPomDfgEMlquTUV0WPkHqALQiv4bEhXawHzsvMr8mw8QTTxWiCS9b1u6QN6SJ-A6pIRdyjhlFwmTdCvBuh4VZfy432FvF_YxiabxpiMP5ylL4j8sHNRH-zLO628tzZ1U_fb_Yb5hZNJsOoMqTB3pY9thoAIW_-JaVg/s1066/IMG_20230213_212546_931.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1066" data-original-width="852" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiuHElc5a5EK2BzcyKLPomDfgEMlquTUV0WPkHqALQiv4bEhXawHzsvMr8mw8QTTxWiCS9b1u6QN6SJ-A6pIRdyjhlFwmTdCvBuh4VZfy432FvF_YxiabxpiMP5ylL4j8sHNRH-zLO628tzZ1U_fb_Yb5hZNJsOoMqTB3pY9thoAIW_-JaVg/s320/IMG_20230213_212546_931.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrmfFtB_aXGDkxLFpYnkTPJ-N3-ju_eqXudExxW0cVLnV3ayVnW4m3BvUxdr2vnzGnNw2Ka4yFOgmlpvIJMsoy9-5cBBqbzLBbYno6-zIVVIE64yLftY3yoSXn68_sGHYpDRLxJIi6kab0uN57fdCgfmRElubU0z1e_RTLiOK39lM2eHRStw/s1350/IMG_20230213_212546_993.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1350" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrmfFtB_aXGDkxLFpYnkTPJ-N3-ju_eqXudExxW0cVLnV3ayVnW4m3BvUxdr2vnzGnNw2Ka4yFOgmlpvIJMsoy9-5cBBqbzLBbYno6-zIVVIE64yLftY3yoSXn68_sGHYpDRLxJIi6kab0uN57fdCgfmRElubU0z1e_RTLiOK39lM2eHRStw/s320/IMG_20230213_212546_993.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p> 12+ years...</p><p><br /></p><p>You've grown up so much.</p><p>Looking at the person you've become now, I feel so blessed.</p><p><br /></p><p>As the proverb says, sejuk perut ibu mengandung. Even the caesarian scar could turn pretty. </p><p><br /></p><p>You were strong, you were brave, and you were rational in accepting the trials Allah has set for you at a young age.</p><p><br /></p><p>You were my strength. You were there to keep me sane. And your presence always reminded me that I should never give up for us.</p><p><br /></p><p>It didn't take long for you to get back up and focus on the future, instead of dwell on the things we couldn't change.</p><p><br /></p><p>فَإِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا، إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا...</p><p><br /></p><p>When Allah takes away something from us, He will surely replace them with something better - sooner or later, in this world on in the Next.</p><p>Yes, we might feel sad and discouraged by certain life events, but Allah has also presented to us things that could make us happy and thankful.</p><p><br /></p><p>Still, the steps you took until now are still just baby steps.</p><p>Great challenges still await.</p><p>We can only pray that Allah would not test us with trials we can not bear, trials that could lead us astray.</p><p>Na'uzubillah.</p><p><br /></p><p>Life will not be easy, but we'll go through it together, if Allah wills. If I could not be around one day, I pray that Allah will lend you others who would love you as much.</p><p><br /></p><p>May Allah continue to guide you and be with you through every step you take.</p><p><br /></p><p>One who has Allah, has everything.</p><p><br /></p><p>Lots of love,</p><p>Mama</p><p>12.2.2023</p><p><br /></p><p>Exactly 2 months til you turn 13.</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-5174134605922478742023-01-23T18:13:00.002+08:002023-01-23T18:13:16.063+08:00For everything ❤️<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTX7-b-yQJep_B04ivy4SwF8hK0RHxymBwoxcu4dAyI-rqcc-6D5b-UpABG9CjjU4OaI4LUDr5I-ZOTyo5xrDs5UELXDVE_wfChjU-pBe4ojHBQK0wgMSqsFcUwohZancsrZyr8n8F4VQPGyYAi2a2BNBN2RpdzqnoCe0WdYbZnI38StgL2A/s1440/Me%20Thank%20You.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1440" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTX7-b-yQJep_B04ivy4SwF8hK0RHxymBwoxcu4dAyI-rqcc-6D5b-UpABG9CjjU4OaI4LUDr5I-ZOTyo5xrDs5UELXDVE_wfChjU-pBe4ojHBQK0wgMSqsFcUwohZancsrZyr8n8F4VQPGyYAi2a2BNBN2RpdzqnoCe0WdYbZnI38StgL2A/s320/Me%20Thank%20You.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">So many things</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Left unsaid</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Only memories</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">And feelings</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">That fades away</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">It's true what they say</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Befriend a perfume seller</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You'll get to smell nice..</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Surround yourself</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">With positive people</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You'll get to absorb their vibes..</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Recharge</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they smile at you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they compliment you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they make you laugh</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they lend you a shoulder</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they hold your hand</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they walk with you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">When they look into your eyes</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Don't worry</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">About what</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">The future might bring</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">It's not your call</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Embrace</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Their presence</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Every second</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Even for a short bit</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Even if they don't realize it</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Maybe</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">They are God-sent;</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">To call you out</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">From the darkness</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You were stuck in;</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">To hold you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">From falling again;</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">To tell you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">That you are doing great;</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">I wish I could tell</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Each and every one</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Of them</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">That they mean</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">The world</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">To me</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Bcoz</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Sooner or later</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">They might not stay</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">And maybe</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Walk away</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">So</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">All I could</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Say is</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Thank you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">For everything ❤️</span></div><br /> <p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-37860730957127222402023-01-23T18:11:00.002+08:002023-01-23T18:11:49.766+08:00As silent as our heart beats<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj996DiwDB9nNYTgjCW9ydOmEYCMm_vayadmH1rczCH3CwTR8wyHjgtfvO6JgzBarg85CEcD1WdpupAXR5vVeAqOKqfxjYpyNluEjkpFzkcQfE-tzBe6QSrk6lrcxVqTVfr5J9af-ZYCrFhqPOzjgLqI-SWl1Hm6SoyiCz5C2f0q_HQllNggQ/s1200/Me%20and%202.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="960" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj996DiwDB9nNYTgjCW9ydOmEYCMm_vayadmH1rczCH3CwTR8wyHjgtfvO6JgzBarg85CEcD1WdpupAXR5vVeAqOKqfxjYpyNluEjkpFzkcQfE-tzBe6QSrk6lrcxVqTVfr5J9af-ZYCrFhqPOzjgLqI-SWl1Hm6SoyiCz5C2f0q_HQllNggQ/s320/Me%20and%202.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You can do it</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You've got nothing to lose</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You'll be fine</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You'll get through</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Just let go</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Don't hold onto things that do not belong to you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Don't wander into thoughts that are not even real</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Don't dwell on feelings that are constantly suppressed</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Don't breathe in a space that continuously suffocates you</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">True enough</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You've swam through greater oceans and even sank countless of times</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">You might have drowned for a bit</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">But you survived</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">2 was there</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Offering some</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Rays of sunshine</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Through stormy days</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">But now</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">It's time</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">To just let silence stay</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">As silent as our heart</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #262626; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: left;">Beats</span></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-19214529156065181602022-09-30T04:39:00.003+08:002022-09-30T04:39:43.836+08:00At my own pace<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWq2T30_RoK77MvzXx5vQAOKCGRQy7hfhaRreN8OLEdhUVYXlWjp-wRUL4XensvaD8lK0EeDKCWPMe7gJ5Sll1Wn6tj14XC1DMqs9WVci5lFFbAv4Na-Vt5-ZBzGQeoDa1yUAGUhqHT9QISjR6He_1T_t6rck6D29-7o3Cb-439AsGyCWFeA/s1920/girl-3403261_1920.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWq2T30_RoK77MvzXx5vQAOKCGRQy7hfhaRreN8OLEdhUVYXlWjp-wRUL4XensvaD8lK0EeDKCWPMe7gJ5Sll1Wn6tj14XC1DMqs9WVci5lFFbAv4Na-Vt5-ZBzGQeoDa1yUAGUhqHT9QISjR6He_1T_t6rck6D29-7o3Cb-439AsGyCWFeA/s320/girl-3403261_1920.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><p>When it gets too painful to move</p><p>Too suffocating to breathe</p><p>Just sit down and</p><p>take a break.</p><p><br /></p><p>Eventually</p><p>You will get back up</p><p>On your feet</p><p>And continue that journey</p><p>You started.</p><p><br /></p><p>Just</p><p>Let me enjoy</p><p>The walk</p><p>At my own pace.</p><p><br /></p><p>Please</p><p>Don't push me</p><p>To venture</p><p>Into the grounds</p><p>I had so much tried</p><p>To escape from.</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-46605862331037612882021-11-12T20:02:00.004+08:002021-11-12T20:02:26.453+08:00Victorious<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDFViu50PBTpjia-SWZXyW6FnEumYfZJD_f3iqhl1KOYSUvBiPfOgyzEQU5abe42TF6QGgVbIF-J0can2IMBIwpmiyDs_T3dr1kyghumJ94BlQW47w0pZXRoq1sCZr6i0abGyk/s843/Victorious.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="843" data-original-width="843" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDFViu50PBTpjia-SWZXyW6FnEumYfZJD_f3iqhl1KOYSUvBiPfOgyzEQU5abe42TF6QGgVbIF-J0can2IMBIwpmiyDs_T3dr1kyghumJ94BlQW47w0pZXRoq1sCZr6i0abGyk/s320/Victorious.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><div class="kvgmc6g5 cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Dearest Nihlah <span class="pq6dq46d tbxw36s4 knj5qynh kvgmc6g5 ditlmg2l oygrvhab nvdbi5me sf5mxxl7 gl3lb2sf hhz5lgdu" style="display: inline-flex; font-family: inherit; height: 16px; margin: 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; width: 16px;"><img alt="❤" height="16" referrerpolicy="origin-when-cross-origin" src="https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/tf3/1.5/16/2764.png" style="border: 0px;" width="16" /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="pq6dq46d tbxw36s4 knj5qynh kvgmc6g5 ditlmg2l oygrvhab nvdbi5me sf5mxxl7 gl3lb2sf hhz5lgdu" style="display: inline-flex; font-family: inherit; height: 16px; margin: 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; width: 16px;"><br /></span></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Yesterday, you've victoriously crossed another important bridge in your life. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">While the waters below go quite wild and dangerous, you could have chosen to cross it differently - by going through the hassle of looking for a boat to float across, or by going into the waters but risking and messing yourself all over, or by creating some big drama so that others around would show some pity come to your aid, or simply by any other means --- but you chose to braved your heart and slowly walk across the fragile, narrow bridge, carefully navigating every step taken by you and your 4 lovely children so that none of you would fall. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">This week, three dear persons told you that you have a big heart and a big soul. I don't exactly know what that means, but I like the sound of it. I think they meant that you're a very nice person. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Everyone who knew the trial you faced yesterday said that they would never attempt to do what you just did or have the courage to go through it without shedding a tear and smile all the way. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Sure, that nasty migraine monster nearly stopped you earlier in the morning from even attempting to cross the bridge, but you worked hard to fight it and tame it down, because you know it will be more peaceful on the other side so you and your kids could live a better life. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Keep on being your selfless self, because I think that makes you special. Continue to be resilient and never allow anyone to pull you down. Always be mindful of your own thoughts, emotions and actions so that you will keep no regrets. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Well done, Nihlah <span class="pq6dq46d tbxw36s4 knj5qynh kvgmc6g5 ditlmg2l oygrvhab nvdbi5me sf5mxxl7 gl3lb2sf hhz5lgdu" style="display: inline-flex; font-family: inherit; height: 16px; margin: 0px 1px; vertical-align: middle; width: 16px;"><img alt="❤" height="16" referrerpolicy="origin-when-cross-origin" src="https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/tf3/1.5/16/2764.png" style="border: 0px;" width="16" /></span></div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Just take in a breath at a time, and step forward proud and victorious. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">I love you and I am very sure everyone around you loves you greatly too. </div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">No matter how lonely you feel the world is, inshaAllah, always keep in your mind and heart that Allah is nearer to you than your own self, and He will always lend you someone every once while.</div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></div></div><div class="o9v6fnle cxmmr5t8 oygrvhab hcukyx3x c1et5uql ii04i59q" style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Love,</div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">Nihlah</div><div dir="auto" style="font-family: inherit;">12.11.21</div></div></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-1715723909516250902021-10-31T19:58:00.001+08:002021-11-12T19:58:52.623+08:00HANDLE WITH CARE<p> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGu6qikqf0Tg6jQgYbUH8rKkM2IJpunPqLBpEHExzMtpaEaFPN1q1MAJFiCS4ISVxEzcLM3QeTh0qYrhONSEt-3YJvFGQyDye-P5Cxn5JXWGCaEMESLbuNa6l78m_Z_xkkchd-/s416/Fragile+Handle+With+Care.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="416" data-original-width="416" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGu6qikqf0Tg6jQgYbUH8rKkM2IJpunPqLBpEHExzMtpaEaFPN1q1MAJFiCS4ISVxEzcLM3QeTh0qYrhONSEt-3YJvFGQyDye-P5Cxn5JXWGCaEMESLbuNa6l78m_Z_xkkchd-/w200-h200/Fragile+Handle+With+Care.jpg" width="200" /></a></p><p></p><div>My Heart</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I feel like</div><div style="text-align: left;">It eerily resembles</div><div style="text-align: left;">A thin sheet of glass</div><div style="text-align: left;">That can</div><div style="text-align: left;">Shatter</div><div style="text-align: left;">Into tiniest of pieces</div><div style="text-align: left;">With the smallest bit</div><div style="text-align: left;">Of pressure</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And those sharp pieces</div><div style="text-align: left;">Will surely hurt</div><div style="text-align: left;">Every bit of flesh in me</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">That's why</div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm holding onto my heart</div><div style="text-align: left;">Ever so tightly</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">And I'm not letting</div><div style="text-align: left;">Anyone</div><div style="text-align: left;">Touch it</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Bcoz I'm afraid that</div><div style="text-align: left;">Nobody</div><div style="text-align: left;">Can be sure to</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Handle it with care</div></div><p><br /></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-3970265244093527992021-08-06T19:53:00.000+08:002021-11-12T19:54:14.982+08:00An epilogue<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMVm6iPGr2Xh5CvOmhHIBoqfLdLRAkK_imvCEUagTnm86eS_TPZqW5_xpOaliUPkaXGI1yrA81izzyFUuyZhPZ7QiBqBHMj4i1bPPjk2o8QzMDfN7f8KmZDSjleyQJeqU2HuEL/s750/Love.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMVm6iPGr2Xh5CvOmhHIBoqfLdLRAkK_imvCEUagTnm86eS_TPZqW5_xpOaliUPkaXGI1yrA81izzyFUuyZhPZ7QiBqBHMj4i1bPPjk2o8QzMDfN7f8KmZDSjleyQJeqU2HuEL/s320/Love.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />Subhanallah.<p></p><p>A major chapter of my life has finally come to an end, officially.</p><p>It has been a long struggle of trying to balance things out and figuring what works best. But we humans are simply just tiny helpless beings, who seem to blindly seek control of our worldly lives, while Allah the Almighty has other plans.</p><p>Things have not been easy, and I reckon that it will not be any easier in the future. Life will continue as is, and new challenges will surely come. But at least, inshaAllah, there is now peace and I could put aside and leave the baggage of guilt and worries that I've been carrying for many years.</p><p>Alhamdulillah, despite the pain and chaos, there are treasures that I can hold on to, and I pray to Allah to allow me to keep them close to me.</p><p>Now it's time to embark on a new healing journey and start writing a new chapter, inshaAllah.</p><p>May Allah forgive us, accept our decision, guide us and pull us closer to Him and His jannah. Ameen.</p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-7376008271262542732021-08-05T11:54:00.007+08:002021-08-05T15:31:56.422+08:00Moving on<p> 5 August 2021.</p><p>Today is the day, inshaAllah.</p><p>13 years minus 2 months and a final full-stop.</p><p>End of chapter.</p><p>May Allah forgive us and redha with the decision that we have made and action that we take.</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmy4Yl_IKrLDkRR4OvzVeST4rD6ilBrHei4Ol75r8OM2ejpKo3dgKUYjP_P8wxxDb_H0L1F9_J2-kwpiFHnBXKP0aG6zWPdxjdSG_BPxCH7LbQkKXJLs4Wj_smeHfXuy09dhyphenhyphenY/s1080/13y-2m.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmy4Yl_IKrLDkRR4OvzVeST4rD6ilBrHei4Ol75r8OM2ejpKo3dgKUYjP_P8wxxDb_H0L1F9_J2-kwpiFHnBXKP0aG6zWPdxjdSG_BPxCH7LbQkKXJLs4Wj_smeHfXuy09dhyphenhyphenY/s320/13y-2m.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-35724849087072902922021-01-07T23:24:00.011+08:002021-01-07T23:28:41.611+08:00The Unexpected Soul-Searching Trip<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmr801Pmje5vRiGGtUCc2sAAFb2FDzLQa2Fmrt-f3-C6gkttO8yX29DDufMwC0dMUyXoMyLu6MVcohloeJHmzwjixvXRJY5opqTqRc9KGnMMP4A-sHTYincBQpBw7ksW_uoOTN/s677/IMG_20200310_171811_312.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="677" data-original-width="677" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmr801Pmje5vRiGGtUCc2sAAFb2FDzLQa2Fmrt-f3-C6gkttO8yX29DDufMwC0dMUyXoMyLu6MVcohloeJHmzwjixvXRJY5opqTqRc9KGnMMP4A-sHTYincBQpBw7ksW_uoOTN/s320/IMG_20200310_171811_312.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">4 - 11 March 2020</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">DAY 1</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTaN4ICNhz4MczGuRC2AXzr2vt9BmDZNJtR53EGXBsALseVzctapjuuFOKLNNVILRd6c7N6pVXS9uTL8PTBB8hJt3pxpBIo3BsEVP9gzwCTWJhke2ZafJ_Po6wZfCU5ozDUZqE/s2048/IMG_2144.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTaN4ICNhz4MczGuRC2AXzr2vt9BmDZNJtR53EGXBsALseVzctapjuuFOKLNNVILRd6c7N6pVXS9uTL8PTBB8hJt3pxpBIo3BsEVP9gzwCTWJhke2ZafJ_Po6wZfCU5ozDUZqE/s320/IMG_2144.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbKqlygz0MQAKjcpoRj65LzPv2FpwcUQtuIGjISEtm4MAInHEA3f3paCqkCZZhHxru5eJVxPagOhQK3BFIVNyz3nr7Z6npvf5V5Ai8qIGIh9g5VnavIf2z6izhXGjiBrHf06QO/s2048/IMG_2214.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbKqlygz0MQAKjcpoRj65LzPv2FpwcUQtuIGjISEtm4MAInHEA3f3paCqkCZZhHxru5eJVxPagOhQK3BFIVNyz3nr7Z6npvf5V5Ai8qIGIh9g5VnavIf2z6izhXGjiBrHf06QO/s320/IMG_2214.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw8e2eYdHvm6aQ0l6zvv7LTdLRB9skLUenepGq3VRwzfng2g-wFdjCnZqs-M6JtV14WspVCNJLHT7xBLb-XzG7QgQccYL8DvZIHNk9fGvb2a-D-CuCPfpmJ-yzlNvIfajA1tof/s720/IMG_20200306_232223_504.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="720" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw8e2eYdHvm6aQ0l6zvv7LTdLRB9skLUenepGq3VRwzfng2g-wFdjCnZqs-M6JtV14WspVCNJLHT7xBLb-XzG7QgQccYL8DvZIHNk9fGvb2a-D-CuCPfpmJ-yzlNvIfajA1tof/w200-h200/IMG_20200306_232223_504.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOGO8CfXAbRywmm9tWWqoNRQ1x3JzDp8dvwcnqgkrE0ySd3FKrz9TaJKuAWkux__zezcdbGGbeJGjqylERy5O0HFLr8BXTuiaE_KgLYU4O5RcrqAXo_L2_Af9m3Wyl5MTGGxtb/s950/Screenshot_20200305_112727.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="950" data-original-width="710" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOGO8CfXAbRywmm9tWWqoNRQ1x3JzDp8dvwcnqgkrE0ySd3FKrz9TaJKuAWkux__zezcdbGGbeJGjqylERy5O0HFLr8BXTuiaE_KgLYU4O5RcrqAXo_L2_Af9m3Wyl5MTGGxtb/s320/Screenshot_20200305_112727.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">DAY 2</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9QkSOTk1u27Du9W1-ya9B5s7kJ5j47m7c0xxU9l4Tc8zNBVVkM3aMmfAHwO2Ru6pliqE1VxYBnHKCnFxVsila4WF79M_4tNgZx_RdPqytc0ixXEf4WtwZ2wwrR8-QZsv6wE69/s2831/IMG_2261.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1111" data-original-width="2831" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9QkSOTk1u27Du9W1-ya9B5s7kJ5j47m7c0xxU9l4Tc8zNBVVkM3aMmfAHwO2Ru6pliqE1VxYBnHKCnFxVsila4WF79M_4tNgZx_RdPqytc0ixXEf4WtwZ2wwrR8-QZsv6wE69/s320/IMG_2261.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdc7fRQBFqYnSeTllL-p1EjHsbHu7mlXpi-lxBHrwFEHoYka84lmGVv4QGno_IJPkknhUygm8P9FC_hrEt_H6PmgOJLBshG0wbgdnWtdkcNtdzre5kJ6YHdd6soYUrAtM0AHhC/s2048/407B9D4D-AEF3-483A-BCC2-6556AD67A964.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1152" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgdc7fRQBFqYnSeTllL-p1EjHsbHu7mlXpi-lxBHrwFEHoYka84lmGVv4QGno_IJPkknhUygm8P9FC_hrEt_H6PmgOJLBshG0wbgdnWtdkcNtdzre5kJ6YHdd6soYUrAtM0AHhC/s320/407B9D4D-AEF3-483A-BCC2-6556AD67A964.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgePM7dwx8cdotcaObFLw6w07IonQjwbyO8-ZkksRDV-URYAOqtHiUDpmFVhB1a2nrMknc81XvH23gkuLEtHreIvn3_1zVWBk_9iSofCpX5I9dcRgZR2L_6lmMZY6QfYrC1Dxsy/s900/IMG_20200323_224517_406.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgePM7dwx8cdotcaObFLw6w07IonQjwbyO8-ZkksRDV-URYAOqtHiUDpmFVhB1a2nrMknc81XvH23gkuLEtHreIvn3_1zVWBk_9iSofCpX5I9dcRgZR2L_6lmMZY6QfYrC1Dxsy/s320/IMG_20200323_224517_406.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXad7nhdTKifZOunSjLFOe7KDTVUCurnIKqz6P9f_gO25MOlZ8ck7JyFMcWuHaIrlSu_8eJWO5KVx5QF8UgpRCfFJ7b9koCrh4HVm7YJiA14bPQc8Rcsjhym_SKASuwH3j0GiP/s951/Screenshot_20200306_230449.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="951" data-original-width="711" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXad7nhdTKifZOunSjLFOe7KDTVUCurnIKqz6P9f_gO25MOlZ8ck7JyFMcWuHaIrlSu_8eJWO5KVx5QF8UgpRCfFJ7b9koCrh4HVm7YJiA14bPQc8Rcsjhym_SKASuwH3j0GiP/s320/Screenshot_20200306_230449.jpg" /></span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDMwh6xQ53UH9qfFyx3MZx8R_Keh3MPNCe9xfOpxljikSvgdMJ9tHISiO8LpeTzr2AEwReOne2LFb4Eb7rnQZvY0w4EtYBJDrwfbjyTIPb7MeyFfXbXoTKwBQyvkpC8XvTLEi4/s677/IMG_20200306_234033_547.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="677" data-original-width="677" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDMwh6xQ53UH9qfFyx3MZx8R_Keh3MPNCe9xfOpxljikSvgdMJ9tHISiO8LpeTzr2AEwReOne2LFb4Eb7rnQZvY0w4EtYBJDrwfbjyTIPb7MeyFfXbXoTKwBQyvkpC8XvTLEi4/s320/IMG_20200306_234033_547.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">DAY 3</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc-kISAV9mzN8xFmMON92Er5n0KVNhAo4itdmfDWvsbMxXu-PycSAImih39bggbvHGD8y3eN00IYNbLi5XzZ89QRU3YnwbD82Xnu6KT3T4rvuKlgi_DutXer4iUXozxT4RJBso/s1000/IMG_20200310_170209_903.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="571" data-original-width="1000" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc-kISAV9mzN8xFmMON92Er5n0KVNhAo4itdmfDWvsbMxXu-PycSAImih39bggbvHGD8y3eN00IYNbLi5XzZ89QRU3YnwbD82Xnu6KT3T4rvuKlgi_DutXer4iUXozxT4RJBso/s320/IMG_20200310_170209_903.jpg" width="320" /></a><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvCsKjQPnzazViA5crxDIG3S1Dd1fNXaCkvaLRJUMD4-HQ5-iMu2ERGJwjv9Aur9QJp-2FVqc5FnC-MEMmWO1PwxA1hsdp7k2oa24Cu7m4ve_cNdRBG-2ulDlLUQ9MVqdxerKf/s2048/IMG_2644.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvCsKjQPnzazViA5crxDIG3S1Dd1fNXaCkvaLRJUMD4-HQ5-iMu2ERGJwjv9Aur9QJp-2FVqc5FnC-MEMmWO1PwxA1hsdp7k2oa24Cu7m4ve_cNdRBG-2ulDlLUQ9MVqdxerKf/s320/IMG_2644.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK2GLpJJO_TneN_Upn0S4I388v0PUKUNmAs-2GjsJEh6ekGgMMwpL4kGrEOzA2-WpH2MQ7KFCWfqMucWN8Hp5omHvXh0oadChzvjYgq3Csxo8eaT4hqDxjbGRIDiLek6nRebsG/s712/IMG_20200309_235457_435.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="629" data-original-width="712" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK2GLpJJO_TneN_Upn0S4I388v0PUKUNmAs-2GjsJEh6ekGgMMwpL4kGrEOzA2-WpH2MQ7KFCWfqMucWN8Hp5omHvXh0oadChzvjYgq3Csxo8eaT4hqDxjbGRIDiLek6nRebsG/s320/IMG_20200309_235457_435.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJxdO1T6_CXMWUNiwu7nlE4de5sCLlVSiNLdylpuE329jQGhywcPFsGDFexhJNv25A0_iDsIrslAJdmPUhSgr_usR3x0qETjjf79SFSCjiqq-qDxkCkE_pHPBZd56GDBT0pFjb/s720/IMG_20200311_061903_994.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJxdO1T6_CXMWUNiwu7nlE4de5sCLlVSiNLdylpuE329jQGhywcPFsGDFexhJNv25A0_iDsIrslAJdmPUhSgr_usR3x0qETjjf79SFSCjiqq-qDxkCkE_pHPBZd56GDBT0pFjb/s320/IMG_20200311_061903_994.jpg" /></a> </div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>DAY 4</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxGNCMgGI_DD0TqNXk-J44teOY2dJk3JLMYyDFWfw1oRx7cnHs5D5mEEOVxikhLFGfw-EGhyignfXPEB_WO73WWqFxXipfiBR6FIsoeub8Ma_nw7PHXrxnpoM8VFmWvJTH_f1F/s2048/IMG_2576.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxGNCMgGI_DD0TqNXk-J44teOY2dJk3JLMYyDFWfw1oRx7cnHs5D5mEEOVxikhLFGfw-EGhyignfXPEB_WO73WWqFxXipfiBR6FIsoeub8Ma_nw7PHXrxnpoM8VFmWvJTH_f1F/s320/IMG_2576.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4s0hX6kVC_nabUaoqYpSkwjbPYFSU6LCoj9riY48QkGRSwYHFksMJk2NX_eUGHeW9QgZWOt62mUZ9FjggrLKZ2rsxfgKesKmxCASUukxUEiukmjaX-Q50_CSVDeX_CJOuXVjq/s2048/IMG_2568.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; 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text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>DAY 5</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrEye0G8G9Fo0Tl1E3ecG0PAc1jKnr1y0Y3dT0Q93G-UhoR7X6QcNpnjBDZEZsaBNxjzC1fP4vUvNCNt6BsjD3hybuvIJzQatnyoYAOlOOhPgQsIKPW9_GK8f3CI9yrcbqCaHj/s2048/IMG_2724.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrEye0G8G9Fo0Tl1E3ecG0PAc1jKnr1y0Y3dT0Q93G-UhoR7X6QcNpnjBDZEZsaBNxjzC1fP4vUvNCNt6BsjD3hybuvIJzQatnyoYAOlOOhPgQsIKPW9_GK8f3CI9yrcbqCaHj/s320/IMG_2724.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjs2YI-WjK-OdzZTjP3_fACFq4e6E3mSY8kmyGOcQ3ZNDHwLuga-VQGACdvrmEGb3W_SZt7fSBLmTfS0k0Y94J_51EZq6xObyJXb32GqSgyQfL3Gg3Y244YSxpLqj7oW8f0A-jJ/s643/IMG_20200311_002547_579.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; 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text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">DAY 6</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtKgpFuAoMUBxHkhwW9M9ULlWArQKvTJJfY_OijttMUIj-WHYrqYTnjUnygyAM0ADB9E8-8VTZxxUwksEy8iYjK-7Einky04VeE-9aA0jjwYHME5nOajYyno-f8S4FmZ5g3pbP/s2048/IMG_2797.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtKgpFuAoMUBxHkhwW9M9ULlWArQKvTJJfY_OijttMUIj-WHYrqYTnjUnygyAM0ADB9E8-8VTZxxUwksEy8iYjK-7Einky04VeE-9aA0jjwYHME5nOajYyno-f8S4FmZ5g3pbP/s320/IMG_2797.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSLygsaWtx4DPGM_q7EWfGljsSaehVKkePMLxUVf0bl8rq8fsRQm05u_dw7teGxDk2ZIGjAhc00b8j_vWnGE0mzupi1mj9OkiFeb0VdJ8qAaiQgmtMc9ZkLOE79YYBOJlu-uM3/s810/IMG_20200311_002547_551.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="810" data-original-width="810" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSLygsaWtx4DPGM_q7EWfGljsSaehVKkePMLxUVf0bl8rq8fsRQm05u_dw7teGxDk2ZIGjAhc00b8j_vWnGE0mzupi1mj9OkiFeb0VdJ8qAaiQgmtMc9ZkLOE79YYBOJlu-uM3/s320/IMG_20200311_002547_551.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivCS2aV4fRWMATOHrBm7Uo38Gg5G7hA4RkBV2SshN7R9x__xghUq5c12Unhz7BP21D2qShRhogB72fWIQLltbNmU8up4zKAv53xtoMuxhp-ZuPkFH7zXtk8c6EYmarMEfG1zXh/s810/IMG_20200311_002547_572.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="810" data-original-width="810" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivCS2aV4fRWMATOHrBm7Uo38Gg5G7hA4RkBV2SshN7R9x__xghUq5c12Unhz7BP21D2qShRhogB72fWIQLltbNmU8up4zKAv53xtoMuxhp-ZuPkFH7zXtk8c6EYmarMEfG1zXh/s320/IMG_20200311_002547_572.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAdsQWJCOI6_7dCOzrO6zY2VXhx_ZwzViJKcvwPPbI7nDWxYbQ8WUpJmP0i6DMG2wRarHHZguYaAX59wMPcaOHdPiUutYdQsIi7tRq97qvTKy-pt1hdP1nXSHsaXlRUiQVe2mp/s810/IMG_20200318_233112_231.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="810" data-original-width="810" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAdsQWJCOI6_7dCOzrO6zY2VXhx_ZwzViJKcvwPPbI7nDWxYbQ8WUpJmP0i6DMG2wRarHHZguYaAX59wMPcaOHdPiUutYdQsIi7tRq97qvTKy-pt1hdP1nXSHsaXlRUiQVe2mp/s320/IMG_20200318_233112_231.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">DAY 7</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLPbamxCp7sSOVywXs7V5bgH1FOBsWqOy4KqrsM2akSgVMroN5lfoYngvhP8347I_XFzc-HOMqMn03Vtvh3WCk_TDvRrZJB_8JgB4LuUClw_Mc9z-7r4cDHSdp8SbGguKCqJNJ/s2585/IMG_20200304_211128.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1216" data-original-width="2585" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLPbamxCp7sSOVywXs7V5bgH1FOBsWqOy4KqrsM2akSgVMroN5lfoYngvhP8347I_XFzc-HOMqMn03Vtvh3WCk_TDvRrZJB_8JgB4LuUClw_Mc9z-7r4cDHSdp8SbGguKCqJNJ/s320/IMG_20200304_211128.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe6nBCx9gQ1egGkoikZHMTxEiHSHy2hrpy_nfdSFfsAYlmpUCs6_Otl2CUaceW3vH4PCTTgXjCldG3Ic71dg5LyeKVnu-1-8iTBea3vf0uj4uklrcgJ4HSs2iG1ce2bDYl6gtG/s2589/IMG_20200304_205803.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2589" data-original-width="1215" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe6nBCx9gQ1egGkoikZHMTxEiHSHy2hrpy_nfdSFfsAYlmpUCs6_Otl2CUaceW3vH4PCTTgXjCldG3Ic71dg5LyeKVnu-1-8iTBea3vf0uj4uklrcgJ4HSs2iG1ce2bDYl6gtG/s320/IMG_20200304_205803.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-22070950677882793712021-01-07T22:38:00.003+08:002021-01-08T12:19:00.106+08:00passion, contentment & happiness<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfhyphenhyphentMBhZPWQJQoUL4rIZDcYZ9rKrzfOLabVIYFwuhrVUCfPU31YupWBy2F7MBlyt4bMx4NdgXljpPKjxfqrz2aVd1RmaGyy2ppgpgcowGQRgMpE-CII02oIiHroCH4fZy07cV/s2048/IMG_20201226_194456_684.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="2048" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfhyphenhyphentMBhZPWQJQoUL4rIZDcYZ9rKrzfOLabVIYFwuhrVUCfPU31YupWBy2F7MBlyt4bMx4NdgXljpPKjxfqrz2aVd1RmaGyy2ppgpgcowGQRgMpE-CII02oIiHroCH4fZy07cV/s320/IMG_20201226_194456_684.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJVDINZ8r8sgiZ36D0-w5gWNHlELhDocfZUR9yBgQFJYYNnDymkkgUdNDW6DhFEkOOngSDtuN_lxFwZ8ouUaLujyK5mRWooZ7LJCvoIntx23CmSHKhdLbhxdwKvAAdfBZXQPRi/s2048/20201226_132915.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJVDINZ8r8sgiZ36D0-w5gWNHlELhDocfZUR9yBgQFJYYNnDymkkgUdNDW6DhFEkOOngSDtuN_lxFwZ8ouUaLujyK5mRWooZ7LJCvoIntx23CmSHKhdLbhxdwKvAAdfBZXQPRi/s320/20201226_132915.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjet8Ug2GE8eh7ivMCOnlrIqERIVO1sckRKnPPl3FKRjNsbhWhluBO1EXhnKH93Eh22y0ccU4tqll4NnO-q4xBcT7hyAfyDPzzBlktnrx5TCUVe1ta8cs0DCy-IclkO6w12LOmo/s2048/20201226_152053.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjet8Ug2GE8eh7ivMCOnlrIqERIVO1sckRKnPPl3FKRjNsbhWhluBO1EXhnKH93Eh22y0ccU4tqll4NnO-q4xBcT7hyAfyDPzzBlktnrx5TCUVe1ta8cs0DCy-IclkO6w12LOmo/s320/20201226_152053.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFIm_9_Nr6YbNYHFg2crHlG0Kawg9J5-QkuQyaCh01XRYecy9vWhyScEtWeneQnaaqAONTAIiTtSRo5Wzie8ote-OYr4Mo5CxhtC3QwJzbjiv8e_EIX6SR7hbcILvPAzJI4uf2/s2048/IMG_20201226_094653.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFIm_9_Nr6YbNYHFg2crHlG0Kawg9J5-QkuQyaCh01XRYecy9vWhyScEtWeneQnaaqAONTAIiTtSRo5Wzie8ote-OYr4Mo5CxhtC3QwJzbjiv8e_EIX6SR7hbcILvPAzJI4uf2/s320/IMG_20201226_094653.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><p><br /></p>I've been thinking what makes me so passionate about Taekwon-Do these years, especially that I am not personally so involved in rigorous trainings or tournaments. I don't think I am fit enough and capable of sitting for further gradings even though I want to. And now because of the pandemic the financial income is honestly quite worrying too. I don't really fit into the group of friends there too because they're all guys and it's not nice for me hang around with them all the time. <p></p><p>But I think, maybe --- it's a quick escape for me.</p><p>A place and time where I can just be myself for a moment and not worry about anything or anyone else. It's like I could leave all the heavy burdens and responsibilities behind. And because the emotional barriers are lifted for a short while, I feel that I could be happy inside.</p><p>March 2020 New Zealand trip presented me a chance to experience and discover a phenomenal yet shocking emotional transition.</p><p>I discovered that I had not felt the sense of 'happiness' for quite sometime, perhaps some years, and I had forgotten what or how being truly happy felt like.</p><p>I spent the first two days there confused and drowned in my own thoughts. I was upset with myself that I had not even noticed that I forgotten something so important.</p><p>Within that two days friends started to notice my mood changes, and I was thankful that a couple of them took the courage to approach me and ask if things were okay. That was when I had to tell myself to snap out of it so that I will not waste the remaining days trapped under my own emotional cave, trying to endlessly figure out what is going on inside me.</p><p>Live the moment.<br />Do not cry over the past.<br />Do not worry about the future.</p><p>Perhaps, Taekwon-Do gave me the courage to continue living and try to be content and happy.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-054MqCf7uQ5s_NfOpjMVBeLOSACXahX_OAJpQmdHaIGSCgJD4cMOif8p3V9QrsApL96E_ZabGCb05DbpsibV6t2OrbHSA1p5hAdxPUp7cb-AV3LN28GxQW53Z_2zHsAjdyVN/s2000/zIsHwoBM.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="849" data-original-width="2000" height="272" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-054MqCf7uQ5s_NfOpjMVBeLOSACXahX_OAJpQmdHaIGSCgJD4cMOif8p3V9QrsApL96E_ZabGCb05DbpsibV6t2OrbHSA1p5hAdxPUp7cb-AV3LN28GxQW53Z_2zHsAjdyVN/w640-h272/zIsHwoBM.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYj1HPys3vWy46Xry_zCq8JSF48d0Okjdi52Sp6whPe5E_y2mFjV7mAiZeCeH4EuOYJetHHHIkd6LnvHrHd54W0BTyr-BE0imEnyT8EhWT02LANXwfKweWRnQgutIo5pxIK4B3/s1000/IMG_20200310_170209_903.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="571" data-original-width="1000" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYj1HPys3vWy46Xry_zCq8JSF48d0Okjdi52Sp6whPe5E_y2mFjV7mAiZeCeH4EuOYJetHHHIkd6LnvHrHd54W0BTyr-BE0imEnyT8EhWT02LANXwfKweWRnQgutIo5pxIK4B3/w400-h229/IMG_20200310_170209_903.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTECficp_nD3fB8siY4PCdmlTcf5ReFWY15mxx36NDIzfD3lqncO44Z_b0dzih29ntzv27gmogaOggLc_V9rGc6fHCIGk-hdrDuO-F2NrZJg4woVsPpd5qBkB_x0a9FOMHV8vh/s2048/kCjXgiPo.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; 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text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8LWiPT7prmjWMue9cVF-anpuTKD7YsY8j-JDnGbbIaWMz_FH3fMP3e90ZT5GyZ1aICIXLKQwb_gLCVfCUO6ViN06m1il6VLDPGQoRP-xo9kDEBUPHNCdbB7cyk4itQLbWQ6bL/s2000/ok3cPa7g.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="536" data-original-width="2000" height="172" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8LWiPT7prmjWMue9cVF-anpuTKD7YsY8j-JDnGbbIaWMz_FH3fMP3e90ZT5GyZ1aICIXLKQwb_gLCVfCUO6ViN06m1il6VLDPGQoRP-xo9kDEBUPHNCdbB7cyk4itQLbWQ6bL/w640-h172/ok3cPa7g.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYc83j3TTN-iTwvZYcku_HPaAuCZMb-o_XAwVXKcWxlwEKzmpV3ziZDARmHqzAhdmGlIdfMqfvyvTKPs12ADOh0zrBHQSLyTlG6tbkeZrgu6gOx8DpI2SBLsysp60TiWTnr8XT/s720/IMG_20200310_170209_915.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="483" data-original-width="720" height="269" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYc83j3TTN-iTwvZYcku_HPaAuCZMb-o_XAwVXKcWxlwEKzmpV3ziZDARmHqzAhdmGlIdfMqfvyvTKPs12ADOh0zrBHQSLyTlG6tbkeZrgu6gOx8DpI2SBLsysp60TiWTnr8XT/w400-h269/IMG_20200310_170209_915.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFvtQg9xKczBCFIq0a2fzTFVHnr-z4AcNw2p2rnDS1-xk-yF92A6zBT4UtQrOWRmco0VsLyx0PjGwe6CsoAP95vN6zbzFz2vkN8t7qHhavfsr6Jkwq08h8DY7cZUD0eG1OA4nG/s2510/CKcQw6Go.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1253" data-original-width="2510" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFvtQg9xKczBCFIq0a2fzTFVHnr-z4AcNw2p2rnDS1-xk-yF92A6zBT4UtQrOWRmco0VsLyx0PjGwe6CsoAP95vN6zbzFz2vkN8t7qHhavfsr6Jkwq08h8DY7cZUD0eG1OA4nG/w640-h320/CKcQw6Go.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNQ1asI00Kc55UD_GVTVHFAjZkBRqxxkaeuyDakS9cSPtIlNgHdZY12bqi1OIvBfSXAXaLeHURDaDVwPIWM2hLyekA0DRwy6vzuwmk4vtQ6vJrbcpERsDU27wMAX8C77FESvN_/s3858/fXLoTSWo.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="815" data-original-width="3858" height="136" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNQ1asI00Kc55UD_GVTVHFAjZkBRqxxkaeuyDakS9cSPtIlNgHdZY12bqi1OIvBfSXAXaLeHURDaDVwPIWM2hLyekA0DRwy6vzuwmk4vtQ6vJrbcpERsDU27wMAX8C77FESvN_/w640-h136/fXLoTSWo.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-5129146816342105832020-11-30T21:57:00.006+08:002020-11-30T21:57:57.516+08:00Cling On<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpoU0W4xNXtl6AMTkn4iht_iZuguIAEPYAnOApkXXPl0UkGlO_MtSfQPmsoGAgbVTrB1KMq6ZsyeOQzjyemhRlNqYHsIA_Ny6ICKNBfQTN40QxH6pxUA2sVsDLtNrBOTYF-o6p/s342/tunnel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="342" data-original-width="342" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpoU0W4xNXtl6AMTkn4iht_iZuguIAEPYAnOApkXXPl0UkGlO_MtSfQPmsoGAgbVTrB1KMq6ZsyeOQzjyemhRlNqYHsIA_Ny6ICKNBfQTN40QxH6pxUA2sVsDLtNrBOTYF-o6p/s320/tunnel.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">they are the source of light at the end of my dark tunnel</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">i will cling onto them</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">i can only hope and pray </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">that they will not suffocate or get hurt because of me</div><br /><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-46582651291687281812020-11-12T23:59:00.002+08:002020-11-13T00:05:06.777+08:00Chaos<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDMLAwPyNr3vuvCOZAVVRPWsS06PfbyzRr70e8RsorW5V5cWX7z_h06GEZHuZzYFsSX2Mk_BBp0VsoquKbPKpzlJmzM1RTKH1c5M2wXr6RIGPrkAk5iYOov07CqXMZkRiJ6Ho3/s1080/broken.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1080" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDMLAwPyNr3vuvCOZAVVRPWsS06PfbyzRr70e8RsorW5V5cWX7z_h06GEZHuZzYFsSX2Mk_BBp0VsoquKbPKpzlJmzM1RTKH1c5M2wXr6RIGPrkAk5iYOov07CqXMZkRiJ6Ho3/s320/broken.jpg" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">If only words could describe how chaotic I am feeling inside these past few weeks. This partial lockdown which has been going on for a month now is really pulling me down and down deep into that unknown darkness.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">It's so difficult to fall asleep but at the same time I just feel like staying in bed all the time. Tasks that previously needed only a couple of hours to be completed are now left untouched for days, weeks and a couple of them even months.</div><br /></div><br /><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-61258114134612624892020-09-09T22:52:00.002+08:002020-09-09T22:59:44.477+08:00B R O K E N<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCzepV6-AgJ8xFKVrVqGthKSJZa-f4X86r88ie53ptW9SyQo_5NugnQhe4bCd-0O4tOsTI3NUDqaO7psdi-xUnyZY2OxBJ_afWQmsho2a41eb8lGZHwZjYbovNOP-hNj4B4QXj/s227/broken.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="227" data-original-width="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCzepV6-AgJ8xFKVrVqGthKSJZa-f4X86r88ie53ptW9SyQo_5NugnQhe4bCd-0O4tOsTI3NUDqaO7psdi-xUnyZY2OxBJ_afWQmsho2a41eb8lGZHwZjYbovNOP-hNj4B4QXj/s0/broken.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> i never thought even a broken friendship could be so painful.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">when years of friendship gets destroyed in an instant, in just a few words, because of ego, selfishness and self-centered mind.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">when years of friendship turns to be worthless and not appreciated.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">when years of friendship gets responded with a sarcastic insult.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">if there's a chance to let things out and talk about it, i think i would.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">but now, it's just too painful that i don't want to talk about it. i'm just not ready because i know with you - you will want to win and be right about what you think, and everything else does not matter.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">not even friendship matters.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">because that was how you previously treat other people in your life.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">and now it's me.</div><p></p>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-59576607906024658032020-08-12T09:58:00.003+08:002020-09-09T22:57:45.440+08:00Travel the World<div>I can't remember the first time my parents brought me overseas, but I am thankful for the experience, alhamdulillah.</div><div><br /></div><div>Before 2002 - Singapore, Indonesia, Thailand</div>2004 - Turkey & Emirates<div>2006 - Jordan, Syria, Lubnan</div><div>2008 - United Kingdom</div><div>between these years there were several trips to Indonesia.</div><div>2014 - Saudi Arabia (Umrah)</div><div>2016 - South Korea</div><div>2018 - Japan</div><div>2020 - New Zealand</div><div><br /></div><div>Alhamdulillah</div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpcOhL0uy56jLXv5rU9Ltv9wI1v-Bugm8D1LfKtvNaHci92s_2cEHWXFMmiUiq2nO_n_BkEbQ9A8i1PiPjlasWzADypkea4Iuu_IUc2VZZBh8MJ2hV9XjOQdhB-1Q3tsZgZlbf/s1080/My+Travels.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="946" data-original-width="1080" height="438" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpcOhL0uy56jLXv5rU9Ltv9wI1v-Bugm8D1LfKtvNaHci92s_2cEHWXFMmiUiq2nO_n_BkEbQ9A8i1PiPjlasWzADypkea4Iuu_IUc2VZZBh8MJ2hV9XjOQdhB-1Q3tsZgZlbf/w500-h438/My+Travels.jpeg" width="500" /></a></div><br /><div><br /></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-51040436872486766512020-08-03T11:46:00.004+08:002020-08-03T11:46:43.531+08:00throwback<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtlQbrEYpLeu3wageKmhcNK96qj1TQQQN2Uo3KdYefV6c_IFQ3f-Ngq4G2VamasytaQ90_zJa2FLYpBjf3OeQ6X_ZrzhMUwY2UxE2hEXVmyUfn82lq_OCOZYECdjR0zpl9Yr4W/s1080/75534194_776819029432520_4302082393810245190_n%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="616" data-original-width="1080" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtlQbrEYpLeu3wageKmhcNK96qj1TQQQN2Uo3KdYefV6c_IFQ3f-Ngq4G2VamasytaQ90_zJa2FLYpBjf3OeQ6X_ZrzhMUwY2UxE2hEXVmyUfn82lq_OCOZYECdjR0zpl9Yr4W/s640/75534194_776819029432520_4302082393810245190_n%25281%2529.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">throwback October 2019.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">graduated master in education with CGPA 3.892 and passed my thesis without correction.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">i miss studying. but i don't think i can take it up now.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">phd wait for me. i hope it will not be too late later</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-48983703034213976662020-08-03T10:18:00.004+08:002020-08-03T21:50:42.409+08:00MDD - Major Depressive Disorder<div><b>22nd June 2020</b></div><div><br /></div><div>I was breaking and nearly stopped functioning. I was trembling and my heart was beating so fast. Breathless and panicking.</div><div>I knew something was not right in me. And this was not the first time in the past few months. I grabbed all purple and pink essential oils on my rack - Lavender, Harmony, Release, Transformation, Motivation, Grounding, Joy. Tonyoh dan deep inhale semua. I desperately needed to get out of this situation. I needed different environment.</div><div><br /></div><div>But I couldn't go far. In fact, I have nowhere to go.</div><div>So I drove to a nearby coffee shop and sat there for many many hours.</div><div><br /></div><div>Suddenly, I finally gathered up the courage to get more help. Called a doctor friend and went to get a a referral letter to get 'treatment'.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><b>15th July 2020...</b></div><div><br /></div><div>Diagnosed with MDD - Major Depressive Disorder.</div><div><br /></div><div>While I acknowledge this sh*t, I am not proud of it. Macam jadi trend pulak anak-anak muda zaman sekarang jadi stress. While I wish people around me know what I am going through 'inside', a part of me is not ready to face the fact that there will be people who will not understand and will just think that "it's all inside your head".</div><div><br /></div><div>I got some prescriptions. I haven't taken them yet bcoz I'm afraid of the side effects bcoz I feel like I don't have any back up if anything goes wrong. But there are days, like today, where I feel like starting to take them to at least feel a little bit calmer.</div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGMIExxNdaiWl5F0bL3YNTU3MtSNF3MCaSg2Gx4lwiDEUix_Z1o71F8At9pPfVgK8bIki3F9DegNOVtk8j9fKqTnZtmxpeTDS-8EPTGrUHn8QesUyJ23-_U04nQjzxtWg0rNTe/s2048/IMG_20200720_002340.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="168" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGMIExxNdaiWl5F0bL3YNTU3MtSNF3MCaSg2Gx4lwiDEUix_Z1o71F8At9pPfVgK8bIki3F9DegNOVtk8j9fKqTnZtmxpeTDS-8EPTGrUHn8QesUyJ23-_U04nQjzxtWg0rNTe/w126-h168/IMG_20200720_002340.JPG" width="126" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div>I've been seeing a counselor and clinical psychologist for nearly 2 years. They help me feel better, rationalize my thoughts and actions. Yet the same stressful cycle is repeating over and over again. And maybe bcoz of that uncertain dark future, I slowly fall into depression.</div><div><br /></div><div>I slowly realize that I couldn't cry when I am angry or sad. I lash out and snap and raise my voice. I hit, although moments later I would regret it. I only cry when I get to talk to someone about what has been happening.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><b>Looking back to the past 5 years...</b></div><div><br /></div><div>Every counselor and psychologist and anyone who knew my condition will tell me to take care of myself first before worrying about what will happen to my kids.</div><div>I'm tired... I'm so tired... But I'm stuck, I'm not looking forward to any possible future, and at the same time I'm afraid of getting into a different trouble even if I could escape from this one now.</div><div><br /></div><div>.</div><div>..</div><div>...</div><div>....</div><div>.....</div><div>OK bye. Serabut tak ke mana ni. Stop stop.</div>NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18597117.post-37407894269618511182020-05-09T15:28:00.002+08:002020-05-09T15:44:05.447+08:00Recipe: Bread Pudding<div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><b>Bread pudding recipe</b></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">(For 1 long loaf of bread)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><br /></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><b>[1] Buttered bread:</b></font></div></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 1 long loaf of bread (cut into squares)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- butter (to spread on bread)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- [later] cinnamon powder</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- raisins (optional)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><br /></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><b>[2] Bread pudding mixture:</b></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">Mix all in a bowl...</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 2 cans evaporated milk</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 2 eggs</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 2 cups sugar</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 1 tsp vanilla extract</font></div></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><br /></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">Steps:</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">1. Pre-heat oven to 180 degrees celcius</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">2. Arrange buttered bread [1] in glass container</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">3. </font><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">Sprinkle c</span><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">innamon powder & a h</span><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">andful of raisins </span><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">(optional)</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">4. Soak & compact press bread</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">5. Bake for 30 - 40 minutes (until golden brown)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><br /></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><b><font face="verdana" size="2">[3] </font><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">Custard sauce:</span></b></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 2 cans evaporated milk</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 4 tbsp custard powder</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 4 tbsp sugar</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- 1 tsp vanilla extract</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">- Pandan leaf (to make it smell nicer)</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2"><br /></font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">Steps:</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">1. Pour half can of evaporated milk into a cup/bowl</font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">2. Mix with custard powder and sugar </font></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">3. Pour remaining evaporated milk, custard mixture, vanilla extract and pandan leaf </font><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: small;">into a small non-stick pot and put on <b><u>slow fire</u></b>. <u><b>Continuously stir</b></u>. </span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.7); font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12.8px;"><font face="verdana" size="2">Caution: mixture easily burns if not stirred well.</font></div></div>
NJhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12891584593224392669noreply@blogger.com0